Is it Intuition or Fear/Anxiety?

Intuition: Part 3

A question that commonly arises when sorting through our senses is, "What is my intuition, and what is my fear/anxiety?"

When you are in the midst of an emotionally charged decision, and the fear of making a mistake creeps in, even though you have a vision of the life and experience you want, clarity can get foggy. It's like when you are driving, and a thick layer of fog comes in, and you can't see the road in front of you. You are forced to focus on what's right in front of you and to take things slow. 

These are the moments when one may reach out for someone else's perspective to validate their experience. We are wired for safety and survival, so our actions tend to align with that. The challenge is that because of how much our collective culture in the US has changed over time, we are wired to fear anything that is perceived as threatening to our well-being—and that can include our own decision-making at times. 

If we have a history of not experiencing what we hope to in life, we begin to question our ability to see things accurately. We can make a decision based on our intuition guiding us, and the moment it doesn't go how we thought it would, we question ourselves and what we feel our intuition was guiding us to. 

When it comes to our instincts, the thing to remember is that it is not always going to lead us to the most pleasant, always happy situations. It will, however, tend to lead us to experiences that will support our growth and evolution to get to what we aim to receive when everything aligns. 

It can be like a chess game sometimes. Because what we desire will have multiple components, and not everyone is aligning their energy with their actions, sometimes we have to wait longer than we'd like for nature to organize things. This doesn't mean that we won't be provided for along the way, just maybe not as we had hoped for. 

For example, when contemplating traveling home to visit family earlier in the year, I navigated a mixture of emotions. I intuitively knew I needed to go home, AND I was incredibly nervous about it. Because my partner couldn't leave for a month - the amount of time I wanted to go for - I knew I'd have to travel solo with my son. I was riddled with my anxieties, even if they may seem silly to some: would I be able to carry everything? What if he's sleeping on the plane, and I need to pee? What if I can't sleep and can't function? What if I get motion sickness again? The what-ifs were endless.

So, I found a way to separate the intuition and the anxieties. I knew going home had to happen. So then I broke down each fear and found a solution to how I would handle the situation if it did arise. And as much as I'd love to say that none of the fears happened - that wasn't the case. I didn't get any sleep, and I did get sick due to motion sickness, and my remedies weren't working. We happened to sit next to the most incredible human, though, who was so engaging with my son while I tossed my cookies in the little bag. She was so understanding, and at the end of the flight, we both felt blessed by the experience. She loved connecting with my son, and I couldn't have handpicked a better person to help me get through some challenging moments. 

I was filled with the realization that when we surrender to the experience, we tend to have the support we need to help us get through tough moments. It took me being honest with her and asking for help and her being open to being my angel on that flight. 

If we get too focused on the situation going exactly as we think it should, we may miss out on how nature is always organizing—just not always in the way we had hoped. 

*Please note, this does not apply to severe acts of trauma and/or violence*

Distinguishing between intuition and fear/anxiety can sometimes be challenging because both can manifest as strong gut feelings or instincts. However, there are several key differences and strategies you can use to help tell them apart:

1. Physical Sensations:

◦ Intuition: Intuitive feelings are often accompanied by a sense of calm or neutrality. While intuition can lead to a sense of certainty, it typically doesn't generate extreme physical sensations like racing heartbeats or sweaty palms.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety can produce physical symptoms such as increased heart rate, muscle tension, sweating, and a feeling of restlessness or unease.

2. Thought Patterns:

◦ Intuition: Intuitive insights often feel like they arise spontaneously without conscious thought. They may not be accompanied by a stream of anxious or negative thoughts.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety often involve persistent and negative thought patterns, such as worrying about potential adverse outcomes or catastrophizing.

3. Emotional Quality:

◦ Intuition: Intuitive feelings tend to be neutral or focused on the situation. They may not be strongly associated with intense emotions.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety are typically associated with strong negative emotions, such as dread, apprehension, or a sense of impending danger.

4. Context and Relevance:

◦ Intuition: Intuitive insights are often contextually relevant and may provide guidance or a sense of knowing in a specific situation.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety can be more generalized and may not always be tied to a specific context or decision.

5. Confirmation Bias:

◦ Intuition: Intuition often doesn't seek confirmation or evidence. It's a sense of knowing that doesn't necessarily require validation.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety can lead to a confirmation bias, where you actively seek evidence or signs that align with your anxious thoughts.

6. Long-Term Impact:

◦ Intuition: Intuitive decisions often align with your long-term well-being and values.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety can lead to impulsive decisions that prioritize short-term relief from discomfort.

7. Self-Reflective Awareness:

◦ Intuition: People who are self-reflective and have developed self-awareness are often better at distinguishing between intuition and fear/anxiety. They can recognize their emotional state and assess whether it's influencing their judgment.

8. Seeking External Perspectives:

◦ Intuition: If you're uncertain about whether you're experiencing intuition or fear/anxiety, seeking input from trusted friends or mentors can provide valuable outside perspectives.

◦ Fear/Anxiety: Fear and anxiety can sometimes be alleviated by discussing your concerns with others, but it's essential to consider whether their input aligns with your long-term goals and values.

Remember that it's normal to experience fear and anxiety in various situations, and these emotions can serve as valuable signals of potential threats or challenges. However, differentiating between these emotions and genuine intuitive insights can help you make more informed and balanced decisions. Developing mindfulness and self-awareness can be particularly helpful in this regard.